I have just finished a very interesting book on body language called Brilliant Body Language by Max A Eggert.
The clue is in the title as to what the book is about.......Body Language. It certainly made me thik about what my body language is saying and giving away about me and what I am verbally saying and whether or not I am backing that up with my body.
For anybody in any work, social, relationship or friendship situation it is very important to make sure that your body mimics what the brain is saying.....
For example if you are proclaiming that a point you are verbally making is correct, but you are not making eye contact,you are blinking more rapidly than normal and are sweating, your body is saying the opposite.......an awareness of these simple habits that are indoctrinated in us allows you to add significant impact to your words.
In the line of work I am in where you have to be confident, assertive, determined, driven and focussed it is essential that I am aware that my body language is displying these traits.......hence the reason why the book was really insightful. I have discovered certain aspects of my body language that I wasn't projecting....this then has an impact on how my subconscious mind perceives the vision I have of me and these are then projected in my body language....
For example, I may well be saying that I am confident and determined, but the way I hold myself betrays my words.
Its simply about saying, behaving and acting like the person you are going to be and already are in the vision in your mind.
So, don't let your body language betray the words you are saying.......start acting and moving in a way that befits the person that you are.........start believing your own hype and the rest will follow.......
Thursday, 16 December 2010
Friday, 3 December 2010
Quotes for the day..........
“The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!” Rocky Balboa
Not sure if I agree with his description of the world, but a great quote all the same……I also love the one below……
“On this team we tear ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that inch. We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when add up all those inches, that's gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing! Between living and dying! I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch. And I know, if I'm gonna have any life anymore it's because I'm still willing to fight and die for that inch, because that's what living is, the six inches in front of your face. Now I can't make you do it. You've got to look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes. Now I think ya going to see a guy who will go that inch with you. Your gonna see a guy who will sacrifice himself for this team, because he knows when it comes down to it your gonna do the same for him. That's a team, gentlemen, and either, we heal, now, as a team, or we will die as individuals. That's football guys, that's all it is. Now, what are you gonna do?” Tony Damato, Any Given Sunday
For those of you that don’t know about American Football, every inch is critical in the game…….by the inch is a sinch, by the yard is hard…….
Not sure if I agree with his description of the world, but a great quote all the same……I also love the one below……
“On this team we tear ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that inch. We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when add up all those inches, that's gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing! Between living and dying! I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch. And I know, if I'm gonna have any life anymore it's because I'm still willing to fight and die for that inch, because that's what living is, the six inches in front of your face. Now I can't make you do it. You've got to look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes. Now I think ya going to see a guy who will go that inch with you. Your gonna see a guy who will sacrifice himself for this team, because he knows when it comes down to it your gonna do the same for him. That's a team, gentlemen, and either, we heal, now, as a team, or we will die as individuals. That's football guys, that's all it is. Now, what are you gonna do?” Tony Damato, Any Given Sunday
For those of you that don’t know about American Football, every inch is critical in the game…….by the inch is a sinch, by the yard is hard…….
Tuesday, 19 October 2010
Thought of the day.......
From The Secret Daily Teachings
Do not worry at all about negative thoughts, and do not try to control them. All you have to do is begin to think good thoughts each day. Plant as many good thoughts as you can in each day. As you begin to think good thoughts you will attract more and more good thoughts, and eventually the good thoughts will wipe out the negative thoughts altogether.
May the joy be with you,
Rhonda Byrne
The Secret and The Power... bringing joy to billions
Do not worry at all about negative thoughts, and do not try to control them. All you have to do is begin to think good thoughts each day. Plant as many good thoughts as you can in each day. As you begin to think good thoughts you will attract more and more good thoughts, and eventually the good thoughts will wipe out the negative thoughts altogether.
May the joy be with you,
Rhonda Byrne
The Secret and The Power... bringing joy to billions
Monday, 16 August 2010
Quote of the day........
CHALLENGES
English proverb:
"A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner."
If you are looking for a reason for your troubles, for a purpose in pain, suffering and challenges, this is it. We are not moulded by the days we spend idling around the pool. Our character is built when we have to make tough choices and when we suffer.
None of us wants tough times; but there is a good reason for them.
English proverb:
"A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner."
If you are looking for a reason for your troubles, for a purpose in pain, suffering and challenges, this is it. We are not moulded by the days we spend idling around the pool. Our character is built when we have to make tough choices and when we suffer.
None of us wants tough times; but there is a good reason for them.
Wednesday, 4 August 2010
Excellent stuff.........
“May you live all the days of your life.”
Jonathan Swift was a writer that lived a couple of centuries ago (1667-1745).
He is perhaps most known for classics like “Gulliver’s Travels” and “A Modest Propsal”. The latter being the ironic and shocking essay where he suggested that impoverished Irish people should sell their babies as food to rich people. Such works has earned Swift a reputation as one of the finest satirists of all time.
Since Swift was a writer there is a ton of things to quote. Here are seven of my favourite words of wisdom.
1. Don’t fear to be wrong.
“A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong, which is but saying… that he is wiser today than yesterday.”
So much of what we learn in society is about how you should not fail and not make mistakes. In school we are taught to get good grades and play by the rules. And so always taking a safe route and not taking risks can become an ingrained behaviour as we learn to associate failure with shame and pain.
But one should really not be afraid of making mistakes. Or admitting that he or she has been wrong. By recognizing that you can release the negative emotions that may dwell within and move on to the next thing. Admitting that you have been wrong also makes it easier to clearly analyze what you did and what you can learn from the experience.
2. Money is useful. Love of it is hazardous.
“A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart.”
Money is very useful. But if you let it take the wrong place in your life it can wreck havoc.
It can create greed and much negativity in your life. And if you love the money, you’ll probably just want more and more. No matter how much you get. And it may not fill you up and finally make you happy as you may have hoped.
The drive to always want more can become like filling a bucket with a hole in it. And as you slowly realize that this won’t work as you had hoped bitterness and negativity can start to feste.
Now, it’s important to not let this reasoning lead you to believe that money is evil. Money is a tool. It can help you to achieve many positive things.
3. Dig where you stand.
“Although men are accused of not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps few know their own strength. It is in men as in soils, where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.”
It’s very easy to fall into an addictive pattern of criticizing yourself and others. But what are the positive things in you and the people around you?
If you just look for things to criticize then that is what you will see. If you look for things to criticize in yourself that is what you will see in yourself and pay attention to in others.
So what can you do? You can start digging where you are standing. Instead of asking yourself those negative questions continually, ask yourself: what is good about me? Ask yourself where your strengths and talents lie. And don’t give up at once just because a negative mindset may initially not let you see what’s good and positive about you.
What you focus on most of the time is what you will see of reality. Knowing your weaknesses and learning from mistakes is helpful. But to dwell on criticism and the negative parts will just keep you in a loop where you create more of that for yourself.
At some point it’s useful to move on from that and start to shift your focus to the positive. And see what gold that will help you uncover.
4. Go further than you may think you can.
“I’ve always believed no matter how many shots I miss, I’m going to make the next one.”
One big problem with success is that you may want it right now. Or at least very soon. No wonder, advertising continually bombards us with messages of how we can become thin or rich in just 30 days. And people often want to believe in that.
Now, I’m not saying that a lot of the stuff out there doesn’t work. They probably do work. I’m just saying that it may take more time, patience and work than advertised to get you where you want to go.
It’s useful to take a break from advertised perspectives and let more realistic perspectives seep into your mind. Learn from people who have gone where you want to go. Talk to them. Read what they have to say in books or online. This will not give complete plan but a clearer perspective of what is needed to achieve what you want.
And then you plug away. You don’t let setbacks or failure discourage you. You go out and try again. And just when you feel like giving up you go on a little further. And a little further.
Because it’s often darkest before the dawn.
5. Put down the extra, unnecessary baggage you are carrying.
“The latter part of a wise person’s life is occupied with curing the follies, prejudices and false opinions they contracted earlier.”
We pick a whole lot when we are young. Some of it is helpful. A lot of it will hold you back and create a lot of unnecessary suffering in your life.
You may have learned things from society – or sometimes gotten stuff drilled into your head – when you were young. You may have taken what someone said or did to you once or repeatedly as an absolute truth about you and your life.
But as a grown up, as you start to examine your life and beliefs you may discover that those things was just things that happened. They are in the past. You are here now.
And by grasping that it’s you who are always in control of your life – that you are creating it right now – you understand that unhelpful beliefs or what happened doesn’t have to mean that much really.
You can choose to drop them and continue with a lightness in your step down a road that you are creating for yourself now. One tip that can help you with that is to first accept that you are carrying the negative thing and how it is affecting you. And then to let it go. Acceptance of what already is does – even though it may sound counterintuitive – make it easier to let something go.
6. Be good to yourself in simple ways.
“The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.”
It’s nowadays common to run yourself into the ground and then, as you feel like a shadow of your former self, to seek help.
But a big part of keeping your health – mentally and physically – in good shape is to prevent problems before they even show up and force you to go to the doctor.
Swift brings some common sense into this challenge. By doing simple things consistently, by making them ingrained habits one can avoid many problems down the line.
• Doctor Diet. Eat not too little or too much. Eat slowly to really enjoy the taste and avoid overeating, an upset stomach and added stress.
• Doctor Quiet. Always being around noise, other people and stimulation via a lot of information can drain you. It’s important to find some quiet time for yourself regularly to avoid being overloaded. Being out in nature is for instance one good way to reconnect with the quiet and stillness.
• Doctor Merryman. How happy and positive one wants to feel is often to a large degree a choice. You can cultivate a negative attitude towards everything. Or a positive one. And a whole lot of tips for creating a positive and optimistic attitude can be found in my book The Power of Positivity.
Now, this may sound like almost stupidly simple advice. And the information is very simple. Many very helpful things are very simple.
More advanced tips can sound intriguing because one may associate complicated with better. But everything has to have foundations. Without those everything you build on top of them will only work at a limited capacity or sometimes just crumble.
7. Be open to the idea that you can always learn.
“No man was ever so completely skilled in the conduct of life, as not to receive new information from age and experience.”
Being open to this will open up your mind. If you think you know everything, great insights and wonderful new paths to explore will just pass you by.
By being open you’ll see, feel and learn things you wouldn’t otherwise. But be careful of focusing too much on learning from books, blogs etc. They have a place and can help you correct things may have done backwards for all of your life.
But the most important thing is to live. And to learn from your experiences. Because it is there you find true understanding of things.
Jonathan Swift was a writer that lived a couple of centuries ago (1667-1745).
He is perhaps most known for classics like “Gulliver’s Travels” and “A Modest Propsal”. The latter being the ironic and shocking essay where he suggested that impoverished Irish people should sell their babies as food to rich people. Such works has earned Swift a reputation as one of the finest satirists of all time.
Since Swift was a writer there is a ton of things to quote. Here are seven of my favourite words of wisdom.
1. Don’t fear to be wrong.
“A man should never be ashamed to own that he has been in the wrong, which is but saying… that he is wiser today than yesterday.”
So much of what we learn in society is about how you should not fail and not make mistakes. In school we are taught to get good grades and play by the rules. And so always taking a safe route and not taking risks can become an ingrained behaviour as we learn to associate failure with shame and pain.
But one should really not be afraid of making mistakes. Or admitting that he or she has been wrong. By recognizing that you can release the negative emotions that may dwell within and move on to the next thing. Admitting that you have been wrong also makes it easier to clearly analyze what you did and what you can learn from the experience.
2. Money is useful. Love of it is hazardous.
“A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart.”
Money is very useful. But if you let it take the wrong place in your life it can wreck havoc.
It can create greed and much negativity in your life. And if you love the money, you’ll probably just want more and more. No matter how much you get. And it may not fill you up and finally make you happy as you may have hoped.
The drive to always want more can become like filling a bucket with a hole in it. And as you slowly realize that this won’t work as you had hoped bitterness and negativity can start to feste.
Now, it’s important to not let this reasoning lead you to believe that money is evil. Money is a tool. It can help you to achieve many positive things.
3. Dig where you stand.
“Although men are accused of not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps few know their own strength. It is in men as in soils, where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.”
It’s very easy to fall into an addictive pattern of criticizing yourself and others. But what are the positive things in you and the people around you?
If you just look for things to criticize then that is what you will see. If you look for things to criticize in yourself that is what you will see in yourself and pay attention to in others.
So what can you do? You can start digging where you are standing. Instead of asking yourself those negative questions continually, ask yourself: what is good about me? Ask yourself where your strengths and talents lie. And don’t give up at once just because a negative mindset may initially not let you see what’s good and positive about you.
What you focus on most of the time is what you will see of reality. Knowing your weaknesses and learning from mistakes is helpful. But to dwell on criticism and the negative parts will just keep you in a loop where you create more of that for yourself.
At some point it’s useful to move on from that and start to shift your focus to the positive. And see what gold that will help you uncover.
4. Go further than you may think you can.
“I’ve always believed no matter how many shots I miss, I’m going to make the next one.”
One big problem with success is that you may want it right now. Or at least very soon. No wonder, advertising continually bombards us with messages of how we can become thin or rich in just 30 days. And people often want to believe in that.
Now, I’m not saying that a lot of the stuff out there doesn’t work. They probably do work. I’m just saying that it may take more time, patience and work than advertised to get you where you want to go.
It’s useful to take a break from advertised perspectives and let more realistic perspectives seep into your mind. Learn from people who have gone where you want to go. Talk to them. Read what they have to say in books or online. This will not give complete plan but a clearer perspective of what is needed to achieve what you want.
And then you plug away. You don’t let setbacks or failure discourage you. You go out and try again. And just when you feel like giving up you go on a little further. And a little further.
Because it’s often darkest before the dawn.
5. Put down the extra, unnecessary baggage you are carrying.
“The latter part of a wise person’s life is occupied with curing the follies, prejudices and false opinions they contracted earlier.”
We pick a whole lot when we are young. Some of it is helpful. A lot of it will hold you back and create a lot of unnecessary suffering in your life.
You may have learned things from society – or sometimes gotten stuff drilled into your head – when you were young. You may have taken what someone said or did to you once or repeatedly as an absolute truth about you and your life.
But as a grown up, as you start to examine your life and beliefs you may discover that those things was just things that happened. They are in the past. You are here now.
And by grasping that it’s you who are always in control of your life – that you are creating it right now – you understand that unhelpful beliefs or what happened doesn’t have to mean that much really.
You can choose to drop them and continue with a lightness in your step down a road that you are creating for yourself now. One tip that can help you with that is to first accept that you are carrying the negative thing and how it is affecting you. And then to let it go. Acceptance of what already is does – even though it may sound counterintuitive – make it easier to let something go.
6. Be good to yourself in simple ways.
“The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.”
It’s nowadays common to run yourself into the ground and then, as you feel like a shadow of your former self, to seek help.
But a big part of keeping your health – mentally and physically – in good shape is to prevent problems before they even show up and force you to go to the doctor.
Swift brings some common sense into this challenge. By doing simple things consistently, by making them ingrained habits one can avoid many problems down the line.
• Doctor Diet. Eat not too little or too much. Eat slowly to really enjoy the taste and avoid overeating, an upset stomach and added stress.
• Doctor Quiet. Always being around noise, other people and stimulation via a lot of information can drain you. It’s important to find some quiet time for yourself regularly to avoid being overloaded. Being out in nature is for instance one good way to reconnect with the quiet and stillness.
• Doctor Merryman. How happy and positive one wants to feel is often to a large degree a choice. You can cultivate a negative attitude towards everything. Or a positive one. And a whole lot of tips for creating a positive and optimistic attitude can be found in my book The Power of Positivity.
Now, this may sound like almost stupidly simple advice. And the information is very simple. Many very helpful things are very simple.
More advanced tips can sound intriguing because one may associate complicated with better. But everything has to have foundations. Without those everything you build on top of them will only work at a limited capacity or sometimes just crumble.
7. Be open to the idea that you can always learn.
“No man was ever so completely skilled in the conduct of life, as not to receive new information from age and experience.”
Being open to this will open up your mind. If you think you know everything, great insights and wonderful new paths to explore will just pass you by.
By being open you’ll see, feel and learn things you wouldn’t otherwise. But be careful of focusing too much on learning from books, blogs etc. They have a place and can help you correct things may have done backwards for all of your life.
But the most important thing is to live. And to learn from your experiences. Because it is there you find true understanding of things.
Tuesday, 3 August 2010
A wake up call........
I was fortunate enough to see a motivational speaker last week at our mid year work conference. Wow, what a fantastic experience. I asked myself the following question during and after the event which reminded me of something that I had been forgetting:
How am I adding value to those people around me and how am I passing on my energy to other people? Two very good questions (even if I do say so myself). The emotions that this guy evoked in me were ones of disappointment and excitement. Disappointment because I had felt like I had lost my way slightly in adding non-material value people and excitement because I knew that I could change it in an instant!!!
One example he gave, is something that I had been doing previously, but had gotten out of the habit of doing and that how you respond to people when they ask you how you are! Simple things eh! He said that the normal response when you are asked about how you are is…….ok, not bad, fair to middling!!!! Those responses are very non-commital!! It reminded me of the power of using more exciting and energetic words such as fantastic, fabulous, awesome, brilliant or something similar!
So I decided that I would reinstate my belief in the power of positive response to the question “How are you?” and put it into practice. So when I went to get my morning coffee at Starbucks when I was in Windsor, I asked the girls behind the till area……”How are you?” their response was “We’re ok thanks, How are you?”, well this was my chance to shine……”I am fantastic thanks” their response was “Wow, fantastic, what have you got be fantastic about?”, “Well I have plenty of reasons really, where do you want me start?” They responded positively and as we continued to chat they ended up saying “We would love to be outside in this weather, but we have to work.” I then proceeded to tell them why it was so great to work where they worked i.e. it’s a really busy site so the time goes quick, the view out of the window is of Windsor castle, its right by the Thames so you can go there with your lunch……….etc etc……
Now, the above sounds a bit cheesy, but it raises the question - What are you enthusiastic about today? What are the things in your life that you are thankful for? What non-materialistic things are you giving others everyday?
Remember you interact with hundreds of people each day either directly or indirectly, why not make their life a bit brighter!
If you look hard enough there is always something to be excited, happy, enthusiastic and energised about. Whether it be the sun shining after the weather being miserable for a few days or having a fantastic meal with friends or simply getting a smile from some one………
How am I adding value to those people around me and how am I passing on my energy to other people? Two very good questions (even if I do say so myself). The emotions that this guy evoked in me were ones of disappointment and excitement. Disappointment because I had felt like I had lost my way slightly in adding non-material value people and excitement because I knew that I could change it in an instant!!!
One example he gave, is something that I had been doing previously, but had gotten out of the habit of doing and that how you respond to people when they ask you how you are! Simple things eh! He said that the normal response when you are asked about how you are is…….ok, not bad, fair to middling!!!! Those responses are very non-commital!! It reminded me of the power of using more exciting and energetic words such as fantastic, fabulous, awesome, brilliant or something similar!
So I decided that I would reinstate my belief in the power of positive response to the question “How are you?” and put it into practice. So when I went to get my morning coffee at Starbucks when I was in Windsor, I asked the girls behind the till area……”How are you?” their response was “We’re ok thanks, How are you?”, well this was my chance to shine……”I am fantastic thanks” their response was “Wow, fantastic, what have you got be fantastic about?”, “Well I have plenty of reasons really, where do you want me start?” They responded positively and as we continued to chat they ended up saying “We would love to be outside in this weather, but we have to work.” I then proceeded to tell them why it was so great to work where they worked i.e. it’s a really busy site so the time goes quick, the view out of the window is of Windsor castle, its right by the Thames so you can go there with your lunch……….etc etc……
Now, the above sounds a bit cheesy, but it raises the question - What are you enthusiastic about today? What are the things in your life that you are thankful for? What non-materialistic things are you giving others everyday?
Remember you interact with hundreds of people each day either directly or indirectly, why not make their life a bit brighter!
If you look hard enough there is always something to be excited, happy, enthusiastic and energised about. Whether it be the sun shining after the weather being miserable for a few days or having a fantastic meal with friends or simply getting a smile from some one………
Thursday, 1 July 2010
Quote of the day........
"So let your deepest desires direct your aim. Set your sights far above the 'reasonable' target. The power of purpose is profound only if you have a desire that stirs the heart."
Price Pritchett
Author of You2
Price Pritchett
Author of You2
An Excerpt from Every Day is a Gift
by Barry Gottlieb
"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."
-The Dalai Lama
What does "True Abundance" mean to you?
According to Wikipedia, the definition of abundance is "the opposite of scarcity." I believe true abundance is not measured by what you have; rather, it is measured by what you give.
In our culture, it seems that most people are caught up in their "need for greed." Perhaps this is why so many people struggle to find their happiness, and why over 25% of the people in our country suffer from anxiety. We live in a culture where we are taught to judge a person based on what they have, rather than on who they are and what they contribute to society.
I was very fortunate to have met a professor that changed my whole way of thinking. I was one of those people with a, "What's in it for me" attitude when I started his class. By the end of the semester though, my philosophy and my attitude had changed. Forever! This is what I learned:
"You can have anything you want in life, if you will just help enough other people get what they want."
-Zig Ziglar
I challenge you to focus on this philosophy for an entire month! Here are some action steps that will help you stay focused on this incredible gift:
ACTION STEPS
Gratitude. Every night before you go to sleep, recite aloud at least ten things for which you are grateful.
Forgive. Let go of the past. Forgive those who have hurt or angered you. Stop carrying this poison around with you every day.
Love. Be sure to tell those people in your life who mean so much to you that you love them and appreciate them.
Donate. Go through your closets. Anything you haven't worn or used in the past year, box it or bag it and take it to a place where those who are less fortunate will benefit from your donation. Get your children involved!
Praise. Make time to praise. Look for and recognize the good in others.
by Barry Gottlieb
"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."
-The Dalai Lama
What does "True Abundance" mean to you?
According to Wikipedia, the definition of abundance is "the opposite of scarcity." I believe true abundance is not measured by what you have; rather, it is measured by what you give.
In our culture, it seems that most people are caught up in their "need for greed." Perhaps this is why so many people struggle to find their happiness, and why over 25% of the people in our country suffer from anxiety. We live in a culture where we are taught to judge a person based on what they have, rather than on who they are and what they contribute to society.
I was very fortunate to have met a professor that changed my whole way of thinking. I was one of those people with a, "What's in it for me" attitude when I started his class. By the end of the semester though, my philosophy and my attitude had changed. Forever! This is what I learned:
"You can have anything you want in life, if you will just help enough other people get what they want."
-Zig Ziglar
I challenge you to focus on this philosophy for an entire month! Here are some action steps that will help you stay focused on this incredible gift:
ACTION STEPS
Gratitude. Every night before you go to sleep, recite aloud at least ten things for which you are grateful.
Forgive. Let go of the past. Forgive those who have hurt or angered you. Stop carrying this poison around with you every day.
Love. Be sure to tell those people in your life who mean so much to you that you love them and appreciate them.
Donate. Go through your closets. Anything you haven't worn or used in the past year, box it or bag it and take it to a place where those who are less fortunate will benefit from your donation. Get your children involved!
Praise. Make time to praise. Look for and recognize the good in others.
Tuesday, 11 May 2010
Poem of the day........
The Next Step
The first step needs action to start it,
The last requires patience to end,
So we question, which one's most important,
When we realize our dreams' our best friend.
Well, the answer is neither, they're equal,
But the one that will help you win through
And connect what you start to the finish,
Is the next step that's waiting for you.
Life's dreamers are great Goal Achievers!
Their faith and persistence just blends
Into one awesome cocktail of knowledge,
That whatever they want they can get.
You see, they never visualize failure,
It's success that they see shining through.
It's essential to start and to finish,
But the next step is what you must do.
Alison Wilson
The first step needs action to start it,
The last requires patience to end,
So we question, which one's most important,
When we realize our dreams' our best friend.
Well, the answer is neither, they're equal,
But the one that will help you win through
And connect what you start to the finish,
Is the next step that's waiting for you.
Life's dreamers are great Goal Achievers!
Their faith and persistence just blends
Into one awesome cocktail of knowledge,
That whatever they want they can get.
You see, they never visualize failure,
It's success that they see shining through.
It's essential to start and to finish,
But the next step is what you must do.
Alison Wilson
Saturday, 8 May 2010
Friday, 7 May 2010
I read this and thought it was cracking........
“Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind.”
Henry James
“Be kind to unkind people – they need it the most.”
Ashleigh Brilliant
“Kind words are short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.”
Mother Teresa
This is a short guide to being a kinder person. It’s not always easy though and I focus on being more consistent rather than trying to be perfect.
But why even make the effort to be kinder? What’s the point? Why not just go about things as you usually do?
Three reasons pop up in my mind.
• By being kinder to others you tend to be kinder towards yourself. Perhaps a bit counter intuitive but this has been my experience.
• You get what you give. Yes, some people will be miserable and ungrateful no matter what you do for or to them. But most people will over time treat you as you treat them. Unfortunately, a lot of people will not take the first step. So if you want a change in your life you have to take responsibility for it and make those first moves. Sitting around waiting for someone else to do them could take the rest of your life.
• It makes your world and the world all in all a nicer place to live in.
So that’s the why. Here is the how to.
1. Be grateful for what you got. It’s very easy to take yourself, your life and the people around you for granted. Avoid that by using two minutes from time to time for reflecting on what you can be grateful for. Or write it down each day in a gratitude journal.
2. Express it. Don’t hold in what you are grateful for. Say it. It may be that you are happy to have brought an umbrella on a rainy day. Or just a small thing such as saying thanks to someone for holding your books for a minute. But even such small expressions of gratitude can make your or someone else’s day better.
3. Minimize judgments. No one likes to be judged. And the more you judge people the more you tend to judge yourself. So it’s a lose-lose situation.
4. Take it easy with the criticism. Constructive criticism has its place. But too much of that or criticism that won’t help anyone just makes people feel and perform worse. Try encouraging them instead. It makes work and the people involved – including you – easier to deal with and more fun.
5. Try to understand the other side. It’s easy to stick to your point of view. But you can gain powerful insights about the other person and yourself too by trying to understand their point of view. This also tends to decrease harshness and negativity and can make it easier to reach an understanding where both parties feel more satisfied with the solution.
6. Make positive observations about people. This is pretty similar to being grateful for what you got but a habit I like to keep in mind and use. Replace the habit of spotting the things that annoy you about people with one where you make small or big positive observations about them. It could be their great sense of style when it comes to shoes, how they always make you laugh when you need it or simply that they are always on time. Be sure to tell them that.
7. Remember the small and kind gestures. Let someone in into your lane while driving your car. And hold up the door for the next person.
8. Remind yourself. It’s easy to forget. Use whiteboards, your cell phone, post-its and other reminders in your daily environment.
9. Awash yourself in the positive memories of the times when you were kind. When you remind yourself how good it felt to be kind and how you helped someone out and made them feel good too it becomes easier and easier to stay kind instead of questioning the habit.
10. Take the smarter and higher road. Don’t be someone the people can walk all over, set boundaries and say no when needed. But recognize that unnecessary conflicts just waste your time and energy. And that some people are so addicted to the drama and conflicts that you will never win or reach an understanding between the two of you. There are more fun and good things to spend time on in your life. So try to reach an understanding in a kind sort of way. But if it doesn’t work then remove yourself from getting drawn into their conflicts and make the day better for both you and possibly them.
11. Be kind to yourself. It’s OK and something that a lot of people don’t do enough. And it seeps over into your world and how you treat others just like how being kind to others seeps back into how you treat yourself.
Henry James
“Be kind to unkind people – they need it the most.”
Ashleigh Brilliant
“Kind words are short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.”
Mother Teresa
This is a short guide to being a kinder person. It’s not always easy though and I focus on being more consistent rather than trying to be perfect.
But why even make the effort to be kinder? What’s the point? Why not just go about things as you usually do?
Three reasons pop up in my mind.
• By being kinder to others you tend to be kinder towards yourself. Perhaps a bit counter intuitive but this has been my experience.
• You get what you give. Yes, some people will be miserable and ungrateful no matter what you do for or to them. But most people will over time treat you as you treat them. Unfortunately, a lot of people will not take the first step. So if you want a change in your life you have to take responsibility for it and make those first moves. Sitting around waiting for someone else to do them could take the rest of your life.
• It makes your world and the world all in all a nicer place to live in.
So that’s the why. Here is the how to.
1. Be grateful for what you got. It’s very easy to take yourself, your life and the people around you for granted. Avoid that by using two minutes from time to time for reflecting on what you can be grateful for. Or write it down each day in a gratitude journal.
2. Express it. Don’t hold in what you are grateful for. Say it. It may be that you are happy to have brought an umbrella on a rainy day. Or just a small thing such as saying thanks to someone for holding your books for a minute. But even such small expressions of gratitude can make your or someone else’s day better.
3. Minimize judgments. No one likes to be judged. And the more you judge people the more you tend to judge yourself. So it’s a lose-lose situation.
4. Take it easy with the criticism. Constructive criticism has its place. But too much of that or criticism that won’t help anyone just makes people feel and perform worse. Try encouraging them instead. It makes work and the people involved – including you – easier to deal with and more fun.
5. Try to understand the other side. It’s easy to stick to your point of view. But you can gain powerful insights about the other person and yourself too by trying to understand their point of view. This also tends to decrease harshness and negativity and can make it easier to reach an understanding where both parties feel more satisfied with the solution.
6. Make positive observations about people. This is pretty similar to being grateful for what you got but a habit I like to keep in mind and use. Replace the habit of spotting the things that annoy you about people with one where you make small or big positive observations about them. It could be their great sense of style when it comes to shoes, how they always make you laugh when you need it or simply that they are always on time. Be sure to tell them that.
7. Remember the small and kind gestures. Let someone in into your lane while driving your car. And hold up the door for the next person.
8. Remind yourself. It’s easy to forget. Use whiteboards, your cell phone, post-its and other reminders in your daily environment.
9. Awash yourself in the positive memories of the times when you were kind. When you remind yourself how good it felt to be kind and how you helped someone out and made them feel good too it becomes easier and easier to stay kind instead of questioning the habit.
10. Take the smarter and higher road. Don’t be someone the people can walk all over, set boundaries and say no when needed. But recognize that unnecessary conflicts just waste your time and energy. And that some people are so addicted to the drama and conflicts that you will never win or reach an understanding between the two of you. There are more fun and good things to spend time on in your life. So try to reach an understanding in a kind sort of way. But if it doesn’t work then remove yourself from getting drawn into their conflicts and make the day better for both you and possibly them.
11. Be kind to yourself. It’s OK and something that a lot of people don’t do enough. And it seeps over into your world and how you treat others just like how being kind to others seeps back into how you treat yourself.
Thursday, 6 May 2010
Wearing nothing but a smile......
Isn't it funny how most of the things we wear cost money, but the most effective, beautiful, unusual and fulfilling thing that anyone can wear is a smile. In a world that is full of negativity the simple act of smiling can radiate through the gloom!
Physically and mentally the simple act of smiling can have wonderful and amazing side effects on you and the people around you. Imagine if the first thing you did when you woke up in the morning was to smile at yourself in the mirror and speak some positive affirmations. It would have a superb effect on the way you start your day (be warned that you might feel like a whally when you first do this. But persevere).
When you walk out of the house smile and think of all the things you are thankful for. Smile as you get on the bus, train, in your car or as you walk. (Be warned people may think that you are a little strange for smiling but they will also be intrigued as to why you are smiling)
Smile when you get into work at everyone you come across, when they ask how are you, tell them you are fantastic or use some other positive word......believe me this creates interest in why you are feeling that way! And when they ask why you are fantastic, brilliant, superb (or any other word you choose to use positively) you simply say.....because I have no reason not to feel like this or because it's a beautiful morning or because you have a wonderful job etc......
Again, be aware if you are not normally like this in the morning or at any time of the day it will be a little strange when you do this. The magic of this is that you start to believe your own hype!!!! You start to feel the energy coming from the words that you speak......you start to genuinely feel amazing,fantastic, superb......
There will be people who will doubt you, knock you, make fun or just simply tell you where to go, but remember they are only saying it because they either wish they had the confidence to say it themselves or by smiling or saying positive affirmations to themselves takes them out of their comfort zones.
Smiling and using positive language is infectious, it energises those people who believe that they have lost their energy.
We all have the ability to do this, try it and see what happens.....keep doing it for 2 weeks and see what happens!!! You will love the results.......
Physically and mentally the simple act of smiling can have wonderful and amazing side effects on you and the people around you. Imagine if the first thing you did when you woke up in the morning was to smile at yourself in the mirror and speak some positive affirmations. It would have a superb effect on the way you start your day (be warned that you might feel like a whally when you first do this. But persevere).
When you walk out of the house smile and think of all the things you are thankful for. Smile as you get on the bus, train, in your car or as you walk. (Be warned people may think that you are a little strange for smiling but they will also be intrigued as to why you are smiling)
Smile when you get into work at everyone you come across, when they ask how are you, tell them you are fantastic or use some other positive word......believe me this creates interest in why you are feeling that way! And when they ask why you are fantastic, brilliant, superb (or any other word you choose to use positively) you simply say.....because I have no reason not to feel like this or because it's a beautiful morning or because you have a wonderful job etc......
Again, be aware if you are not normally like this in the morning or at any time of the day it will be a little strange when you do this. The magic of this is that you start to believe your own hype!!!! You start to feel the energy coming from the words that you speak......you start to genuinely feel amazing,fantastic, superb......
There will be people who will doubt you, knock you, make fun or just simply tell you where to go, but remember they are only saying it because they either wish they had the confidence to say it themselves or by smiling or saying positive affirmations to themselves takes them out of their comfort zones.
Smiling and using positive language is infectious, it energises those people who believe that they have lost their energy.
We all have the ability to do this, try it and see what happens.....keep doing it for 2 weeks and see what happens!!! You will love the results.......
Wednesday, 5 May 2010
Tip of the day......I read this and felt inspired
Ok, even though this isn’t real inspirational I am still hoping this will be helpful to you or someone close to you. As you may know by now, I am a self-educating, lifelong learner and while my grammar may be terrible at times, I hope you really get what I am trying to share today.
Many times in life I have wanted to make changes (for the better) and found that even the thought of trying to do something new forever kept me from attempting to make the change. Just yesterday a friend shared with me a strategy that works for her and many others she teaches.
She simply said, “David, can you do it ‘Just For Today’?” and I said of course I can then she said, “Great, do it! Then tomorrow repeat the same process tell yourself you are going to do it ‘Just For Today’ and watch and see what happens…”
Now I was floored by this subtle little change and while I know it may not be a big revelation to some people, for one person on this list it might just save their life. What if ‘Just For Today” they stay on their diet, or take exercise, or meditate or not drink or not drug themselves.
Whatever changes you want to make in your life I urge you to apply the “Just For Today” approach and see what happens for you. “Just for Today” I walked on the beach, meditated, and juiced a healthy breakfast.
Just For Today was inspired by Delena Zimmerman written by David Boufford
Many times in life I have wanted to make changes (for the better) and found that even the thought of trying to do something new forever kept me from attempting to make the change. Just yesterday a friend shared with me a strategy that works for her and many others she teaches.
She simply said, “David, can you do it ‘Just For Today’?” and I said of course I can then she said, “Great, do it! Then tomorrow repeat the same process tell yourself you are going to do it ‘Just For Today’ and watch and see what happens…”
Now I was floored by this subtle little change and while I know it may not be a big revelation to some people, for one person on this list it might just save their life. What if ‘Just For Today” they stay on their diet, or take exercise, or meditate or not drink or not drug themselves.
Whatever changes you want to make in your life I urge you to apply the “Just For Today” approach and see what happens for you. “Just for Today” I walked on the beach, meditated, and juiced a healthy breakfast.
Just For Today was inspired by Delena Zimmerman written by David Boufford
Tuesday, 4 May 2010
Take ownership.....
Ownership is a key ingredient of finding fulfillment in our work and in our lives. When we don't create an attitude of ownership, we leave ourselves open to the whims and ways of circumstance and the choices of others. Ownership is going beyond pulling your own weight, and beyond doing your share. It resides in a place of doing what needs to be done. Regardless."
~John G. Blumber
~John G. Blumber
Thursday, 29 April 2010
Keep an open mind to attract what you want.....
Life is full of opportunity in all different places. One lesson that I have learned in order for you to be able to discover the opportunities that could change your life, you have to be open to new and exciting ideas. That means keep you eyes open and keep your mind open.
I have certainly found that my goals are achieved more quickly and with much less effort when I don't stress about how they are going to happen. I focus on the end goal and keep my mind and eyes open to opportunities that could get me there. The minute we stop trying to get to our end goal and start believing that we already have it we open ourselves up to fanastic things.
We are amazing human doings and we have the ability to attract all of our goals to us and the ability to be able to attract all of the opportunities that we desire.
I have certainly found that my goals are achieved more quickly and with much less effort when I don't stress about how they are going to happen. I focus on the end goal and keep my mind and eyes open to opportunities that could get me there. The minute we stop trying to get to our end goal and start believing that we already have it we open ourselves up to fanastic things.
We are amazing human doings and we have the ability to attract all of our goals to us and the ability to be able to attract all of the opportunities that we desire.
Ownership is a key ingredient of finding fulfillment in our work and in our lives. When we don't create an attitude of ownership, we leave ourselves open to the whims and ways of circumstance and the choices of others. Ownership is going beyond pulling your own weight, and beyond doing your share. It resides in a place of doing what needs to be done. Regardless."
~John G. Blumber
~John G. Blumber
Tuesday, 27 April 2010
Quote of the day.......
INSPIRATION & MOTIVATION
If you're quiet, you're not living. You've got
to be noisy and colorful and lively.
--Mel Brooks
If you're quiet, you're not living. You've got
to be noisy and colorful and lively.
--Mel Brooks
You are ok already.......
Does this sound familiar?
Sometimes we hesitate to accept ourselves as we are because we're concerned that we'll become lazy and stop striving to grow into our full potential. This misunderstanding come from the philosophy "Don't rest on your laurels." The core message says, "You're still not perfect enough, not quite 'there' yet, so don't stop to appreciate yourself because you might get stuck where you are."
But self-acceptance doesn't mean you give up your intention to expand, excel and grow. Self-acceptance actually accelerates your potential for growth because it nurtures you from within.
Accepting your perfectly imperfect self is an inside job. It can't be postponed until you're convinced you're living up to your own or someone else's definition of perfection.
Strive to live in a state of radical self-acceptance. Whenever you get stuck in the realms of criticism and perfectionism, give yourself some space so the universe can cut you some slack called "grace".
When you get wound up in a state of unworthiness, guilt, shame, or embarrassment, give yourself some grace with this reminder:
"I'm alright already."
Because you are!
Peace and blessings,
Michael Bernard Beckwith
Sometimes we hesitate to accept ourselves as we are because we're concerned that we'll become lazy and stop striving to grow into our full potential. This misunderstanding come from the philosophy "Don't rest on your laurels." The core message says, "You're still not perfect enough, not quite 'there' yet, so don't stop to appreciate yourself because you might get stuck where you are."
But self-acceptance doesn't mean you give up your intention to expand, excel and grow. Self-acceptance actually accelerates your potential for growth because it nurtures you from within.
Accepting your perfectly imperfect self is an inside job. It can't be postponed until you're convinced you're living up to your own or someone else's definition of perfection.
Strive to live in a state of radical self-acceptance. Whenever you get stuck in the realms of criticism and perfectionism, give yourself some space so the universe can cut you some slack called "grace".
When you get wound up in a state of unworthiness, guilt, shame, or embarrassment, give yourself some grace with this reminder:
"I'm alright already."
Because you are!
Peace and blessings,
Michael Bernard Beckwith
Monday, 22 March 2010
You are more powerful than you think........
I sometimes astound myself with the things that I achieve and to what level I can consciously and sub-conciously push myself both mentally, physically and emotionally.
I recently completed a 15k fell race in Scotland and the majority of it being run in the dark!!! I have never done a fell run, never run across country in the dark and have never felt a burning in muscles like it........but with little specific training and a hell of a lot mental and physcial focus I achieved the end goal.......I finished and I finished in under 3 hours.
I am not telling you this to impress you but to totally impress upon you the extremes that we can go to as individuals when we put our minds to it. You have such immense power, resources, knowledge, strength, ability, focus, belief that you can achieve anything you believe you can do.......it all starts in your head.
If any of you want a challenge, then come and do The Mighty Deerstalker which takes place every year in March, have a look and see what you think.
Or set yourself a challenge that you believe will definitely stretch you at some level and push you onto the next level........never fear the results because they are going to be phenomenal.....
Speak soon.
DD
I recently completed a 15k fell race in Scotland and the majority of it being run in the dark!!! I have never done a fell run, never run across country in the dark and have never felt a burning in muscles like it........but with little specific training and a hell of a lot mental and physcial focus I achieved the end goal.......I finished and I finished in under 3 hours.
I am not telling you this to impress you but to totally impress upon you the extremes that we can go to as individuals when we put our minds to it. You have such immense power, resources, knowledge, strength, ability, focus, belief that you can achieve anything you believe you can do.......it all starts in your head.
If any of you want a challenge, then come and do The Mighty Deerstalker which takes place every year in March, have a look and see what you think.
Or set yourself a challenge that you believe will definitely stretch you at some level and push you onto the next level........never fear the results because they are going to be phenomenal.....
Speak soon.
DD
Wednesday, 3 March 2010
A great poem........
Our Deepest Fear
by Marianne Williamson
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were all born to manifest the glory of God within us. It’s not just some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
-Marianne Williamson from her bestselling book A Return to Love
by Marianne Williamson
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were all born to manifest the glory of God within us. It’s not just some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
-Marianne Williamson from her bestselling book A Return to Love
Tuesday, 23 February 2010
Love.........
I am truly blessed to have some amazing people in my life who I have grown to love over different periods of time...... They have enriched my life without doubt. My parents have given me the foundation from which to build the amazing life I have shaped. My sisters have given me the support and guidance (through varying means) that has given me important ingredients to how rich my life is. The rest of my family have again given me amazing experiences that have allowed me to grow.
The friends I have contributed superb opportunities for me to shape my personality, life, attitude and outlook on life and they still continue to contribute.
My finacee, who compliments every part of my life, has allowed me to rise up to amazing new levels and had given me the confidence, energy and power to explode my potential.........
However, I would have never attracted these people into my life or maintained the relationships with my family without loving and putting love out there...........I truly believe that to receive love you have to give love
Now I agree that might sound very romantic and spiritual.......but, it simple.......for you to be loved you have (a) love others and (b) love yourself........love is the clear key to happiness in relationships, work, health, wealth and in mind, body and spirit......
So get busy loving peeps, its the way forward.....watch your relationships blossom, watch your health improve and watch the universe bring people, things and circumstances into your life...........
The friends I have contributed superb opportunities for me to shape my personality, life, attitude and outlook on life and they still continue to contribute.
My finacee, who compliments every part of my life, has allowed me to rise up to amazing new levels and had given me the confidence, energy and power to explode my potential.........
However, I would have never attracted these people into my life or maintained the relationships with my family without loving and putting love out there...........I truly believe that to receive love you have to give love
Now I agree that might sound very romantic and spiritual.......but, it simple.......for you to be loved you have (a) love others and (b) love yourself........love is the clear key to happiness in relationships, work, health, wealth and in mind, body and spirit......
So get busy loving peeps, its the way forward.....watch your relationships blossom, watch your health improve and watch the universe bring people, things and circumstances into your life...........
Quote of the day........
RESPONSIBILITY
"We have to believe in free will. We've got no choice."
Isaac Bashevis makes it clear that we are responsible for our actions. Are you satisfied with your life. That is to your credit that you are living the life you want and creating reasonable expectations.
Are you dissatisfied with your life. That is your responsibility to do better and/or make more reasonable expectations.
Take charge. You have no choice, because you have free will.
"We have to believe in free will. We've got no choice."
Isaac Bashevis makes it clear that we are responsible for our actions. Are you satisfied with your life. That is to your credit that you are living the life you want and creating reasonable expectations.
Are you dissatisfied with your life. That is your responsibility to do better and/or make more reasonable expectations.
Take charge. You have no choice, because you have free will.
Friday, 5 February 2010
Quote of the day.........
"You can live each day in a world filled with 'problems,' or rise each morning and embrace a world filled with unseen solutions...eager for you to find them. The decision is yours...both worlds exist. The one you choose is the one you will create."
~Michael McMillan
Pink Bat
~Michael McMillan
Pink Bat
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